We lie to avoid pain.
The pain comes from those around us’ perceived actions once they know the “truth.”
The truth, on the other hand, is highly overrated if you ask me: “my” facts are colored by the glasses I see the world through, where my glasses are made of all my experiences, knowledge, things parents taught me, and I have never questioned- nor I am aware of – etc.
So, the glasses are highly personalized; how can my truth be objective, impersonal then?
You can see the facts: a person you love has changed behavior – you don’t talk, or you don’t laugh as earlier.
We interpret this fact; what “meaning” we give to it is up to our glasses.
If you interpret it as a sign of cheating and act accordingly – you will end up being cheated whether it is now the fact or not. You’ll turn yourself into a jealous, insecure person; insecurity is not attractive. So, voila! There you have it- he or she doesn’t like you anymore.